Rules of the Road

Alcohol, particularly bourbon, Jenna’s father’s favorite drink, is a recurring symbol for painful memories. Jenna describes a recurring nightmare to Mrs. Gladstone where she “was taking a shower and instead of water coming out, it was bourbon […] I kept trying to turn off the flow, but the bourbon was washing over me and getting in my hair and eyes and mouth. I kept trying to spit it out, but I couldn't” (66). She felt as though she was drowning in bourbon the way she is metaphorically drowning in the destructive cycles with her father. Bourbon is the drink associated in Jenna’s memory with the night her mother decided to divorce her father, and when Jenna finally confronts her father, she tells him that the “smell of gin, bourbon and scotch” (198) are what she remembers most about her childhood.

The expression “Daddy’s home” is a recurring motif. It stands alone in the running commentary of Jenna’s thoughts and portrays the dread Jenna feels of the impending chaos, pain, and disappointment she has experienced multiple times throughout her life when her father shows up drunk. The unannounced visits and embarrassing situations, broken promises, missed birthdays and school events are all summed up in the powerful, resentful, angst-ridden expression.